(◡‿◡✿): My Way

I’m going to open my blogpost with the usual “sorry I haven’t uploaded” “ive been meaning too” “there are 100000000000000 drafts, trust”

What has been on my mind lately is ”career”, I realised I went into teaching completely blind. The more I read about ambitious people, the more I realise that I lack it (lol). The reason why I wanted to become a teacher is because I wanted to change the world, but you know by only a bit. I wanted to change someones life and have them see that the world is a big and beautiful place. But im beginning to think that I am not cut out for it. No matter how hard ill try, I don’t think ill be happy spending the rest of my life being a teacher. I know it will be rewarding- but will I be doing something that I love?

I had a dream a few nights ago. I don’t remember what happened in it but I do recall me saying “that’s it I want to do journalism”. Haha so that made me want to look for my goal in life. I want to change the world. I want to have the light at the end of the tunnel, and look back on my life thinking, I got here myself.

Another reason why this sprung into mind was Costa- my tutor last sem was saying- get a back up plan with teaching, cause you will burn out. I have to admit that did scare me but he also said “why did you become a teacher? Did you want to climb the teacher career ladder? Did I want to be a principal? Did I want to become an academic? Did I want teaching as a career????” (he said it to the whole class not strictly me)

And that when I realised I am studying teaching for a job- not a career.

I made myself so mad.

I realised that while I was growning up- I never thought about what I wanted to do with my life. Yeah I wanted to be an actress- but I was told that its too hard- so I gave up. That why I admire ems, she chose what she wants and she is going to get it. I guess I could try to strive for it again- but I kinda feel like that ship has sailed.

What am I trying to get?

When my dream came I began to think- hmmm journalism- and I thought of Robin Scherbatsky (yeah I know lol). She wanted to be a news anchor like- crazy bad.

So i thought- could I do that? Could I write articles, and investigate and ect.

And im beginning to think I could. I don’t think I want to be a news anchor, but a journalist and a photo journalist.

I’m thinking, I would love to get myself into thick situations, travel the world and take photos, interview people and watch the action unfold in front of me. I want to meet people and understand them.

I love people. Like the idea of people. Personalities, difference, their story, their view and how they work. And if I could spend the rest of my life meeting new people and taking photos of how I see them- I think I would be forever grateful and happy.

I feel like this burst came out of no where- but im really considering taking it as a career path.

I just want to be happy- you know?