How do you know when you need help?

How do you know ?

Am I ok?

I think I do but I'm such a drama queen maybe I'm overthinking it

My actions are really beginning to scare me

Sometimes I feel like everyday I'm miserable for a different reason. I don't think I've ever had a day where I didn't feel lethargic. Is it time I seek help? 

I really don't trust myself

I'm always about to then something happens and I feel like oh I'm just being dramatic 

I feel like there's no one to talk to who will understand and I feel like an idiot


I don't know I guess I scare myself sometimes  

week 3 day 1 [last week] [ladies exhibition]


An adorable pic by a student














Peter Garrett LOL




and Jahmikas Birthday!








The only picture i took at tame impala



Finally 






















LOL look at bobs hair





Eeh and I and me and Eeh


So basically TAME IMPALA

Twas great, I got to meet eehs tafe friends at first I was awkward but then we had a drink and it was really fun! I got more followers on my art Instagram (thank god eeh mentioned it wooo more followers!) 

we talked about

  • rick and morty
  • any British TV show- like mighty boosh, the IT crowed, Snuff box, Peep Show, ect
  • They didnt know what burger men were
  • Eehs life in Tafe


but anyways

The main part of this story is that

We were in the crowd waiting for Tame to come on and then eeh nudged me and was like- they asked it, and I was like what? oHHHH yeah we are and I put my arm around him, but I laughed and I was like eew no! (as a joke of course)

We get asked this ALL THE TIME its LIKE DUUUUUDE

Are you guys dating?

bahahahah

if we had a dollar for every time we get asked that!

We would probably have like $7?

But still it makes us laugh!

its nice having a platonic friendship! Whenever people ask me if we are dating It feels nice because it like- nah we have a FRIENDship #yeah just nice to have a friend aye

I’m trying to think of the many times we have been asked, like I recall Luke asking, then this guy asking (at tame), and Jessica’s friend at her birthday asking cause we had matching nose rings- and the people who pierced us asked- cause I was scared and he held my hand and they went aww and we were like NO!

But yeah its just really funny to us I guess

Tame impala was cool and yeah//


That’s about it!






week 2 - day 2 - how do you hold a moon beam in your hand?

Alright hello,

How are you?
Time to update youse on my prac again, it is currently day 2 of week two, I got meself a free expresso machine and post it notes because while I was going to buy thai food for huynh (because valley thai and huynhs house is on the way home from the school + plus huynh is ok company, nood good, but not bad) a girl was legging it out of the store! And she dropped something and these two old dudes were like stop you dropped something and they three of us were watching her run and we were like what da heck and she turned a corner and looked back very menacingly and then I realised she was probably shop lifting

 Iwent up the the men and asked what they found and they told me that found post-it notes and that he doesn’t want them, so I took em LOL

And one of the teachers laughed and was like “hey does anyone want a free espresso machine?” and I was like yeah and he was like ok and I was like ok

Anyway I have tame impala tmr and im so tired, im drinking a coffee with no sugar which is gross~ me no like! Maybe I should transition to green tea but still

What also totally sucks- Andrew
Hes off to his reserves thing when I finish my prac and I barely get to see him which totally bums me out!  Hes free on the 29th, im thinking of maybe going somewhere with him, I haven’t told him but it might freak him out but being in this staff room makes me want to be som domestic like shucks it sounds fun

There are 3 prac students, me irene and alexia

And 2 male staff Luke and Raghib (my supervising teacher)

And 6 female
Alex, jo, Josie, Felicity, Italian one which I forgot her name but shes nice) and the other who I also forgot her name but she is also nice, not a teacher but a teacher help.

The staff is rather big and I love it here, when I finish my prac I really want to casual here

Its really fun here because we constantly have massive conversations about nothing, yesterdays topic were kids and whether or not we should have them

First we were talking about formals and how alex and jo were about to attend a formal and instead they went into the next room (a building convention) and drank wine a pretended to be a part of it, of course they went back to the formal and did formalities- but they went back, got drinks and charged it to a random table! Baahahhaa I could not stop laughing and how at another formal a teacher (whose last year teaching there) got really drunk and pulled over the limo to vomit!

Omg teachers be crazy, I am so sure no one got drunk at our formal (teacher wise) or did they….?

Talking about formals, on Friday I was talking to a student, she had an eyebrow piercing and  she told me she didn’t want to go to her formal, I think she was goig through a “teen angst im too cool” phase and she said she wanted to go to the beach instead which im like fair enough! But no! go! Look pretty! Dance the night away “but they wont play music I like” we who cares man I don’t remember my formal but still- it wasn’t that enjoyable but it would be memorable!

I don’t know, its her choice but yeah

What else oh yeah! The reason why I want to be domestic- we were talking about how they got drunk at the formal and then out of no where one of the teachers was like 

“man I didn’t know how much your life changes when you have a kid!”

 and boom a whole period and a half dedicated to “kids are the worst!” “It ages you!” “they need to grow up!” “my daughter is … and she need to do her own laundry! I am not cleaning a 20 year olds period pants! Its ridiculous!” and then josie who has a 5 year old son laughed in the other room and she retorted with “DON’T YOU LAUGH YOU HAVE A SON!!!!” and we all bursted out laughing.

And then Felicity walked in a jo was like “they change your life! You are not married until you have a child! You no longer become a couple! YOU ARE A TEAM!!!!” And stuff along those lines and how “you would easily kill yourself for you child” and Felicity was just wide eyed and like WHAT THE FUDGE!


It has been a real hoot here!!!

Just hearing about having children and living in your house and stuff like that gets me so excited for the married life, I know that sounds so weird but wowowoowowoowoww hahahaha



Ok


OMG news,, so I sat in this one class and there was this boy! This boy! I sat behind him and my oh my HE DID MY HEAD IN he didn’t do any work he drove me nuts I pretended to go toilet (which is in the library) just so I can get outta there but the learning support was there too! And im just like- I do recall that he had a learning disability so I needed to get to the bottom of this behaviour! so I asked to look at his files (not file files but see what his disability was)
 I wont give you his name but he looks white, blonde hair and bright eyes (Blue? Green? Don’t recall my eyes were blood red cause I was so mad) and hes at a 3rd grade reading level…..
 He moved from the lowest class to this one to maybe fix his behaviour but the opposite thing happened! The class began irritable instead!

He can barely write.. so that’s why he disrupts the class instead, so he doesn’t need to . plus hes aboriginal

I just- I hated him less after that, like there was a plan for him, he needs very visual aids and we need to differenticate (meaning you cant single him out and give him work at his level but make everyone do the same which is annoying and only brings the rest of the class down he need out for his and the classes own good) but I am learning a lot here

Ok that was my day


Little note, I have a playlist on Spotify with songs of my name (yeah I know) but the one song Maria in the sound of music always reminds me of Miss Naso, she was such a mother, she told me- when ever I think of your name I think of that song- “how could you soulve a problem like maria”

She was always so lovely- I probably gave her a hard time


But im really learning, and my passion is really coming back








how do you solve a problem like maria? how do catch a cloud and pin it down?Sound of Music - The Nuns