you know whats frustrating
depression bleh LOL
i was talking to a m8 of mine who has it as well and i was like "it came outta no where! i woke up and i was like welp i guess ill just die" and she was like yep i guess its something we have to live with
Like i was so hype before this happened, its was like what- 3 weeks ago i was sending postive vibes, i was gonna do yoga, i wanted to meditate i was looking forward to LIVIN
but then out of no where i woke up and the sky was grey, nothing had colour, and my heart was heavy. Its very hectic. and frustrating.
And i kept trying to pull myself out of it, i kept trying to think postive thoughts, do good things but i felt like i kept getting knocked down
you just eventually get stuck
bad things kept happening
like my foot, my fine, my brother, peanut getting ill, having to de sex peanut, my money falling out of my pocket, having to quit my job
it all him me at once, and this morning, or yesterday i dont recall suddenly the sky was blue again and i was out of my head. i felt relieved but also a little mad. I dont know whether i pulled my self out of the depressive rut of whether or not it just subsided.
like do i control it/can i control it or is it just like the weather? where i have to wait it out?
im not sure
so that happened, but i am out of the rut now i guess. im kinda trying to be postive and be proactive, maybe start writing a resume
who know, i just felt like i havent blogged in a while.. I also need to start painting and doing art. try and get an instag following you know?
I am also slowing trying to get back into teaching, very slowly. working my way up there haha
well bye now i just wanted to babble for a bit
and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something
MilkShakes
We all know that age old questions.
If you were to have dinner with anyone in the world who would it be? Dead or alive? Well answer changes everyday. And today its Kelis.
I don't know how but i stumbled upon a video about her cooking and ever since then i really admired her. If i were to take anyones voice it would def be Kelis. I absolutely love her. I mean i totally forgot i saw her in person performing Milkshakes at Splendour in the Grass. Her ass was massive and she looked great. her version of milkshakes was a jazzy one too she was amazing.
But after seeing her change her life after music is very inspiring. She will always be known as the milkshake girl. But she started her own kitchen and pop up store. So here is a bit of insight of how she changed her life around.
This is one of my all time favourite songs
I love this video clip so much. It reminds me of saturday mornings, watching tv making my own breakfast and waiting for mum to come home.
love letter
[Intro]
This is that once in a lifetime...
[Verse]
Yeah, oh, once in a lifetime, a golden opportunity
Golden like the sand that you finally took me through to see
Was holding tight my hand, while I dipped a toe into the sea
I smiled like an idiot, but you still saw the sleuth in me
Hair up beautifully, considering the future
We were hitting up the candy shop and I felt truly super
It never seemed a place or time that I would stay in place to see
That question resting on our minds, like "Would you run away with me?"
Yeah, okay, how about it? We could start a new life
Living beach house days and garden view nights
And maybe think back to high school, starting food fights
Across from all my best friends, like "You all are too nice"
But now the heart of moonlight hits, and we'll just watch the stars dance
Attempt to mimic them until our little hearts can't
Take anymore of that vacant ancient decor
When it breaks and we can make for the door
And depart fast, and honestly, you look like Mozart sounds
You're a warm embrace compared to the cold, hard ground
The chicken noodle soup when I've been fretting sick in bed
It's like expecting death and restlessness and then catching a kiss instead
You're a myth that's said to hide via love
An angel who was once thought to reside in skies above
You're the sand between my toes when the high tide comes
Matter of fact, you're the air that's inside my lungs
You had sand in your hair and your fingernails
Trying to find a good spot in the shade
I suggested that we put up all our things for sale
You suggested we just up and run away
I had sweat on my palms and across my face
Thinking "If we did it would it go well?"
I suggested we don't wait even one more day
You suggested that I bring my favorite shells, well
This is that once in a lifetime...
[Verse]
Yeah, oh, once in a lifetime, a golden opportunity
Golden like the sand that you finally took me through to see
Was holding tight my hand, while I dipped a toe into the sea
I smiled like an idiot, but you still saw the sleuth in me
Hair up beautifully, considering the future
We were hitting up the candy shop and I felt truly super
It never seemed a place or time that I would stay in place to see
That question resting on our minds, like "Would you run away with me?"
Yeah, okay, how about it? We could start a new life
Living beach house days and garden view nights
And maybe think back to high school, starting food fights
Across from all my best friends, like "You all are too nice"
But now the heart of moonlight hits, and we'll just watch the stars dance
Attempt to mimic them until our little hearts can't
Take anymore of that vacant ancient decor
When it breaks and we can make for the door
And depart fast, and honestly, you look like Mozart sounds
You're a warm embrace compared to the cold, hard ground
The chicken noodle soup when I've been fretting sick in bed
It's like expecting death and restlessness and then catching a kiss instead
You're a myth that's said to hide via love
An angel who was once thought to reside in skies above
You're the sand between my toes when the high tide comes
Matter of fact, you're the air that's inside my lungs
You had sand in your hair and your fingernails
Trying to find a good spot in the shade
I suggested that we put up all our things for sale
You suggested we just up and run away
I had sweat on my palms and across my face
Thinking "If we did it would it go well?"
I suggested we don't wait even one more day
You suggested that I bring my favorite shells, well
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